Put Your Head on My Shoulders/Transcript
Credits. Caption: Not Based On The Novel by James Fenimore Cooper. :['''Scene': Planet Express: Lounge. On the TV the heads of George Washington and Abraham Lincoln sit on podiums in front of a red curtain.]'' Lincoln: TV Four score and 1145 years ago our forefathers' foreheads conceived a new nation. Washington: TV And this Presidents' Day we honoureth those values that my body fought and died for. :the heads the curtain opens and reveals a car showroom. The salesman, a robot with pieces falling off, points to a car. Malfunctioning Eddie: TV Values like this brand new Plymouth V'Ger! Hi, I'm Malfunctioning Eddie and I'm malfunctioning so badly I'm practically giving these cars away! Amy: Hey, let's go car shopping! My parents promised if I got all B's they'd buy me a bar, and I got all C's! Bender: Mind if I tag along? I gotta bring my ass in for servicing. picks up a recall notice. The recall notice says it could burst into flames in a low-speed collision. Fry: No wonder you've been staying at the back of conga lines lately. Leela: I'll get my coat. Let's go, Bender. :taps his ass with a rolled-up newspaper and it bursts into flames. Amy, Fry and Leela recoil in horror. :['''Scene': Malfunctioning Eddie's Showroom. A man with an accent introduces himself to Amy.]'' Victor: Hello, I am Victor and I know many things about the art of unloading fine cars on beautiful women. :kisses her hand. Leela: Uh-huh. Now tell us she's witty and sophisticated. Victor: Ah-ah-ah! A gentleman always sells a lady a car first. takes Amy over to a car. This is the Beta Romeo. Yes, the Beta Romeo. Note the cross-your-heart seat belt which protects, lifts and separates. :the coffee machine Fry pours himself a cup. A salesman puts his hand on his shoulder. Thundercougarfalconbird salesman: Spotted her the minute you walked in, didn't you, sir? She's a real beauty. Fry: Yup, she's beautiful coffee alright. Salesman: No, the Ford Thundercougarfalconbird! takes Fry over to a car. Nothing makes you feel more like a man than a Thundercougarfalconbird. So how much were you thinking of spending on this Thundercougarfalconbird? Fry: Sorry, I'm not here to buy. Salesman: I understand, and it's wonderful you don't care whether anyone questions your sexual orientation. Fry: I care! I care plenty! I just don't know how to make them stop! Salesman: One word: Thundercougarfalconbird! :and Victor sit in the Beta Romeo. Victor: The luxurious seats are stuffed with eagle down and the dashboard inlaid with the beaks of a thousand eagles. Also, there are some eagles under the floorboards. Amy: That's an awful lot of eagle. Victor: Yes, and yet-- :sighs. Amy: What's wrong? Victor: It is just ... the luxury edition has so much more eagle. It saddens me to think of you missing out. Amy: Oh, don't be sad. My parents are paying and they're incredibly rich. :raises his right eyebrow and pushes it down again with his finger. :['''Scene': Service Department. Bender lies on a raised platform and a mechanic drills into his back, causing him pain. The mechanic lowers him to the floor and he gets up.]'' Mechanic: I installed shock-absorbing bumpers to reduce the risk of catastrophic butt failure. :turns around and gasps at what he sees grafted to his butt. Bender: You, sir, have defaced a national treasure! I demand you restore my buttocks to their former glory. :gets back onto the platform. Mechanic: Alright. But sooner or later that ass is gonna blow, and when it does, I just pray you're not moonin' someone you care about. :['''Scene': Malfunctioning Eddie's Showroom. Amy and Leela look under the bonnet of the Beta Romeo.]'' Amy: Smeesh, Leela! This car has everything a beautiful woman like me needs. Victor said so. :chuckles. Victor: to himself No dog food for Victor tonight. :closes the bonnet. Leela: OK, the sticker says 55,000, but we'll only go as high as, say-- :puts her hand in the air. Amy: 60,000! :sighs. Victor: Oh, I will have to ask my manager. :walks into Malfunctioning Eddie's office. Leela: Amy, you don't go up from the sticker price. Amy: I thought it was an auction. :the office window, we see Victor say something to Eddie. Eddie smiles and they both dance. Victor comes back out again. Victor: He is not too happy. Amy: I'm sorry. 80,000? :head explodes. :['''Scene': New New York City Street. Amy and the others drive back to the Planet Express building. Outside, she prepares to park the car.]'' Amy: Uh-oh. I'm terrible at parallel parking. :car moves into a space sideways then shunts two cars in front and behind it. :['''Scene': Planet Express Corridor. Fry and Leela walk past Hermes' office.]'' Hermes: inside And now you're asking for a day off? Get out of my and my sight! and Leela look at each other and shrug. You're bogarting my patience. :door opens and Hermes walks out. Leela: Hermes, who were you yelling at? Hermes: Myself. I asked myself a Valentine's Day off, but I was in no mood for any of my shenanigans. Fry: Valentine's Day's coming? Oh, crap! I forgot to get a girlfriend again. Well, since neither of us has a date, why don't we...? Leela: You just assume I can't get a Valentine's date? Fry: Shall we say eight o'clock? :Amy. Amy: Hey, I'm taking my new car out for a spin to Mercury. Anybody wanna come? Fry: Yeah, OK. What's the weather like? Amy: The usual: Boiling lead, oceans of lava. Fry: So, what? Shorts? :['''Scene': Amy's Car. They drive across the Mercurial surface listening to music.]'' Fry: Boy, this A.C. is incredible! shivers. I'd better turn on the heater too. does and the fuel gauge starts to go down. They pass Hg's Fuel, the only fuel station on the planet. shouting Boy, this heater is incredible! I'd better turn up the A.C. some more. Amy: shouting Hey, how about some icy margaritas? Fry: shouting Yeah! pushes a button and two glasses and a mixer comes out. The fuel gauge drops further. We're slowing down! Amy: shouting Don't worry. I'll hit the fuel guzzler! :presses a button and the car accelerates. Fry: shouting Who wants pop-tarts? puts the pop-tarts in the toaster and turns it on full. The engine stops, the heater and A.C. go off, the mixer stops and the car jerks to a halt, then falls to the ground. Amy gasps and sees the fuel gauge is empty. Fry takes his shades off and sees the sign to Hg's Fuel; 4750 miles one way, 4750 miles the other way. Uh-oh! Amy: It's OK, I have an emergency phone. :picks up a make-up case and applies blusher to her cheeks. Fry: What are you doing? Amy: Spluh! It's a video-phone. presses a button on the steering wheel and a screen and dialling pad fold out. She dials. Lucky I'm a member of the Astro-Afro-Antarctico-Amer-Asian Auto Association. man appears on the screen. Hello? Septuple-A? :sun beats down on the planet. Beads of sweat pour down Fry's face. He leans back over the seat and pulls the hood over the car. Fry: Phew! :finishes her call and sighs. Amy: It'll be a couple hours. Oh, I'm gonna get sweat on my sweat-suit. :pulls the zip on her top down. Fry: Hey, tell me something: You've got all this money, how come you always dress like you're doing your laundry? Amy: I guess 'cause my parents keep telling me to be more ladylike. scoffs. As though! Fry: I've been there. My folks were always on me to groom myself and wear underpants. What am I, the Pope? :laughs. Amy: Yeah, and if you were the Pope they'd be all, "Straighten your Pope hat," and, "Put on your good vestments." laughs then Amy joins in. You know, Fry, it's nice to find someone I can talk to about stuff, and junk. Fry: Yeah, it's like we feel the same way about junk and stuff, or, whatever. :smiles. She smiles back. :['''Scene': Mercury Surface. Later, the sun is setting and the Septuple-A recovery truck arrives. A man gets out and sees the car hood is steamed up. He laughs, rubs off the condensation and peers inside. Amy and Fry each hold a hand of cards. The man sighs disappointedly.]'' :['''Cut to': Amy's Car. The recovery truck tows it.]'' Amy: So while they're towin' us, you wanna do it? Fry: Yeah. :kiss and disappear below the seats. The man laughs again. :['''Scene': Planet Express: Meeting Room. The next morning, the staff sit around the table as Hermes presents a chart to them.]'' Hermes: Which concludes the summary of the movie I saw last night. Now, any old business? All: simultaneous No. Hermes: Any new business? All: simultaneous No. Hermes: Anyone spend the night together? :except Fry and Amy replies "No". Amy: Yep. Fry: Kind of. :gasps. Bender: What? Hermes: Oh, my God! Amy: We ran out of fuel on Mercury and one thing led to another. Fry: And it led there again when we got home. :and Amy chuckle. Bender: Congratulations, Fry, you snagged the perfect girlfriend. Amy's rich, she's probably got other characteristics. Leela: Bender! Romance isn't about money. Bender: Oh, so it's just coincidence that Zoidberg here is desperately poor and miserably lonely? Puh-lease! Leela: For your information, it's because he's hideous. :sighs. Hermes: Well I think Amy and Fry go together like a lime and coconut. Farnsworth: Do I hear wedding bells? Fry: What? No! Farnsworth: Really? Oh, dear. :pats the side of his head. Zoidberg sighs. Zoidberg: You're both very lucky. I'd pay anything to end my miserable loneliness. If only I weren't so desperately poor. Bender: Wait. You mean people will pay good money for romance? Hmm. I think I have a scheme so deviously clever that I-- :['''Scene': Courtroom. The judge bangs his gavel.]'' Judge: $500 and time served. Bender: Stupid anti-pimping laws! turns to Leela. Well, pay the man! :struts out. His two Hookerbots follow him. Hookerbot: Bender, honey, we love you! Bender: Shut up, baby, I know it! :['''Scene': Planet Express Corridor. Bender hammers a sign on a door that has "Bender's Computing Dating Service. Discreet And Discrete" written on it.]'' Bender: Ah, computer dating. It's like pimping but you rarely have to use the phrase "upside your head". Leela: Bender, this is stupid. Why would anyone come to you for romantic help? Bender: Hey! Don't make me go upside your head! :['''Scene': Planet Express: Zoidberg's Office. Zoidberg files his claws while Hermes knocks on the supply room door.]'' Hermes: shouting Fry! Amy! Put your pants back on! I need a stapler. :struggles to open the locked door. Zoidberg blocks his way. Zoidberg: Stop! Stop! If you interrupt the mating dance the male will become enraged and maul us with his fearsome gonad. :['''Cut to': Planet Express: Supply Room.]'' Fry: whispering It's working, they think we're making out. laugh then juggle. Wait, why aren't we making out? Amy: I 'unno. :kiss and drop to the floor. :['''Scene': Planet Express Corridor. Outside the lounge, Larry, Lou and a saleswoman from Alien Overlord & Taylor queue to use Bender's dating service.]'' :['''Cut to': Planet Express: Lounge. Bender has set up his dating service at the table and is about to interview a client.]'' Bender: OK, Mister...? Zapp: Uh, Smith! Zapp Smith. Uh, Brannigan. Bender: Just check off the things you're looking for in a love partner. :hands Zapp a sheet of paper. Zapp: Let's see ... Oh, yes! punches out a hole. Yes, definitely. punches out another. Oh, I'd like some of that. one. Mmm, I'll just have everything on the menu. :punches out the rest of the holes and hands it back to Bender. Bender: Now to run it through our high-speed romance-a-logical data-fier. screws up the sheet and throws it in his chest cabinet and imitates a computer by beeping. He then pulls out a random sheet and hands it to Zapp. Say hello to Miss Right! Zapp: sexfully Hello! :rubs the paper against his chest. :['''Scene': Planet Express: Supply Room. Amy and Fry finish making out. Fry gasps.]'' Fry: Wow! We're great kissers! Amy: Yeah! Hey, later, you wanna drive out to Europa? We could have a picnic and spit watermelon seeds at Jupiter. Fry: Hey, yeah! I used to spit at stuff back in the 20th century. Ah, it's cool how we sort of think exactly alike, and junk. Amy: Yeah. Y'know, Fry, I really like hanging out with you. :is shocked. :['''Scene': Planet Express: Hangar. Leela welds a section of the cargo lift while Fry paces backwards and forwards.]'' Fry: Everything was going great. Then, all of a sudden, she's talking about hanging out. Hanging out? She's getting way too serious. I'm not a one woman man, Leela. Leela: You'll be back to zero soon enough. Fry: Don't you get it? She's smothering me. :walks past. Amy: Hi. Fry: You see? You see? Now she's bothering me when I'm at work. Leela: Fry-- Fry: I'm doing my job, there's Amy; I spend a few hours selecting a candy from the machine, there's Amy; I wake up the morning after sleeping with Amy, there's Amy! Leela: I think you're over reacting. Fry: Am I? shouting Am I? talking Face it, I'm a prize catch. belches. I mean, I'm pulling down delivery boy money. Leela: Fry, she's pulling down billionaire trust-fund money. Fry: Then she wants me as a trophy husband. Leela, you gotta come to Europa with us. I can't be alone with her. :arrives with a picnic basket. Amy: So, ready for a secluded picnic with just you and me? Fry: Hey, you know who loves secluded picnics with just you and me? looks over Amy's shoulder at Leela. She shakes her head. Uh, Dr. Zoidberg. :scavenging through a dustbin, looks up. Zoidberg: Did someone say something about a free hot meal? :['''Scene': Amy, Fry and Zoidberg listen to Scruffy the Cat's Moons of Jupiter as they drive to Europa. They pass the orbiting Monolith from 2001: A Space Odyssey which has an "Out of Order" note taped to it and drive across the icy surface.]'' :['''Cut to': Amy's Car. Zoidberg eats the contents of the picnic basket.]'' Zoidberg: Mmm, I haven't eaten since Tuesday! Bird eggs, animal slices ... gobbles down the food. ... dry woven reeds! eats the basket. All gone! Can I drive? Amy: No. So, Fry, you busy tomorrow? I got two tickets to the big ape fight. Fry: Jeez, we're already planning to spend Valentine's Day together. Isn't that enough? Amy: OK, sure. What do you wanna do for Valentine's Day? Fry: Oh, so all of a sudden we're spending Valentine's Day together? Amy: But you just said-- Fry: That's it, Amy, we have to talk. Zoidberg, you drive. Zoidberg: Wahoo! :['''Cut to': Outside Amy's Car. The car tips as they change places.]'' Fry: inside Pardon me, excuse me. :['''Cut to': Amy's Car. Zoidberg is at the wheel while Fry and Amy are in the back.]'' Zoidberg: Ah, I'll just turn the wheel to maximum fastness! :turns it. Amy screams. Fry: Amy, you know how at first you like chocolate but then you start to get tired of it because it always wants to hang out with you? Amy: Huh? You don't like chocolate? Fry: Look, could chocolate just let me finish? Zoidberg: Vroom, vroom! And the winner of the big car race is ... Hot Rod Zoidberg! :mimes a crowd cheering. Fry: Amy, what I'm trying to say is, I think maybe you and I should stop-- :in the front snaps. Zoidberg has pulled the wheel off. Zoidberg: Uh-oh. Here, you drive! :offers the wheel to Fry. The car spins out of control, hitting chunks of ice. It heads straight for a huge mountain of ice. Fry screams and the car crashes. :['''Scene': Europa Surface. Fry comes to. Zoidberg looks over him.]'' Zoidberg: Fry? Are you alright? Fry: Ow! My head is killing me. What happened? Was anybody hurt? Zoidberg: No, no, no, no, no, of course not. Nobody but you. I'm afraid your body was badly damaged in the crash. Fry: How badly? Zoidberg: That's it over there. points to Fry's headless body. Fry screams. Don't worry, I managed to keep your head alive with some quick surgery. :moves his eyes up and down. Fry: Where is it? :points. Zoidberg: There. :turns to his right and sees Amy's head. Zoidberg has grafted his head onto her left shoulder. Amy: Looks like we'll be spending a lot more time together, Fry! :screams. :['''Scene': Planet Express: Farnsworth's Lab. Farnsworth and Zoidberg inspect Fry's body. Leela tuts.]'' Leela: This sort of thing always happens with office romances. Zoidberg: Don't worry, Fry, we'll have your body all fixed up in a few days. lifts Fry's body up over his shoulder. Upsy daisy! :walks out of the room, hitting the body on the walls on the way out. Fry whimpers. Fry: Well, Amy, I'll try not to interfere with your life too much. :appears to pick her nose. Amy: Fry! Fry: Ooh, sorry. I guess I control that arm. :waves the arm around and hoots. Amy: So, what was it you wanted to talk about before we crashed anyway? Fry: Oh, that. turns and sees Farnsworth sweeping behind them. Maybe we'd better talk in private. whispering I'll meet you in the closet. :['''Scene': Planet Express: Supply Room.]'' Fry: Amy, I really like you, as a friend. But I think we're spending too much time together. Amy: You're breaking up with me? Fry: I just think we should start seeing other people. Amy: But, I was really having fun. sighs. If that's how you feel. Fry: I'm sorry, but it is. Amy: Well, whatever. Hey, listen, as long as we're not seeing each other, you mind if I ask someone else out for Valentine's Day? Fry: Huh? Amy: I mean, unless it would make you feel bad, being a third wheel. Fry: Hey, I can get a date too. Now that I'm single, I'll attract all sorts of women! Amy: With my body I think you might only attract one sort of woman. Fry: happy Oh! disappointed Oh! :['''Scene': Planet Express: Lounge. Bender drinks from a bottle. Leela sits down and plays with his "Dating Consultant" nameplate nonchalantly.]'' Leela: So, how's business? :opens his chest cabinet, revealing a huge pile of money. He pulls out a $500 note. Bender: Are you familiar with my friend Al Gore? I'm tellin' you, losers get really desperate around Valentine's Day. Leela: Yeah, it's pathetic alright! whistles. Bender hums. How much? Bender: 500 bucks. Leela: Done. Bender: Zapp Brannigan OK? Leela: No! Bender: 600. :['''Cut to': Planet Express: Hangar. Enter Leela who sees Fry and Amy playing table tennis. Fry sees Leela.]'' Fry: Oh, hey, Leela, uh, can I talk to you for a minute? turns to Amy. In private? Amy: Oh, no problem. :puts her fingers in her ears and sings to herself in Chinese. Fry: This is an emergency. Amy made Valentine's plans with some goon and I'm gonna be stuck there, lonely and miserable. Will you be my date, please? Leela: You're too late, Fry. I'm sharing Valentine's Day with a very special man. He's not Zapp Brannigan or anything! Fry: Then I have no choice but to do something so pitiful and embarrassing that I'm ashamed to tell you about it. Leela: Bender's in his office. Fry: Thanks. :['''Scene': Planet Express: Lounge. Amy continues to sing while Fry does business with Bender.]'' Bender: I got your hook-up, Fry. Now, my usual fee's 500 bucks, but seeing as how it's you, I'll need it in advance. :['''Scene': Amy's Apartment. Amy dresses herself while Fry "helps".]'' Amy: OK, Fry, we're done putting on the bra. Fry: Why exactly did you shave your legs anyway? Are you expecting something to happen with your Valentine's date? Amy: What business is it of yours? Fry: And another thing: You're using an awful lot of make-up there. Amy: This is deodorant. Fry: What does it do? :doorbell rings. Amy reaches for her dress. Amy: shouting C'mon in, Gary! I'll just be another 20 minutes. Gary: outside I'll be waiting. Fry: 20 minutes? You're practically ready now! Amy: Yeah, but it's good to make them wait a little. Fry: Oh, God, it's true! :['''Scene': Elzar's Fine Cuisine. Amy, Gary and Fry sit at a table. Fry eats a hamburger.]'' Gary: That dress looks great on you. Amy: simultaneous Thanks. Fry: simultaneous Thanks. watches the door. Where is she? Gary: I must say, Amy, you're all made up, just like Fry's date. Get it? :shakes her head. Amy: Mm-mm. Fry: I've got a date. She'll be along any minute. :Bender with an old woman. Bender: Fry, look who I found! It's Petunia, your dream girl! Petunia: How's them eats? Fry: Uh-- Petunia: Don't mind if I do. puts the hamburger into her handbag. Kids'll be hungry. Fry: whispering She seems a little old for me. Bender: She is well-travelled. And I don't mean she travels a lot! Petunia: Wheels fell off my house. Bender: Now how about a rose for the lady? Five bucks a pop! Gary: I'll take one. Fry: Oh, yeah? Well I want one too. Bender: Eight bucks. Fry: But you just said-- Bender: Demand suddenly skyrocketed. You all saw it! :another table, Leela sits alone. She sighs. Bender arrives. Bender: Leela, meet your future husband Sal. :wears blue overalls and has a cigarette in his mouth. He cringes. Sal: Nice eyeball, eyeball. Leela: Nice ass, ass. Bender: Ooh, sparks! whispering Buy her a rose, I guarantee she'll put out! :considers then sits down. Sal: Eh, I'll take my chances. :Lapse. Bender's other clients are also there. Larry eats from Hattie's fork and Zapp makes a toast with his woman who has a five-o'clock shadow. Zapp: Cheers! "Woman": Cheers! Petunia: So tell me about your prospects. You a good gambler? Fry: Well, ma'am, I-- Petunia: What's your game? Bingo? Keno? Wait a minute! You don't have your own body. Fry: No, but I control this arm. Petunia: Slots player, huh? Sorry, but I think I can do better. :gets up from the table. Fry: Wait, come back, uh, darling. Petunia: Can't, hon', I gotta catch my bus back to Nutley. I'd kiss you goodnight but I lost my teeth pulling out a stump. :walks towards the exit. Sal: So anyways, Leela, I'd love to take a whack at ya but that 10:15 to Nutley ain't goin' nowheres without yours truly behinds the wheel. Petunia: Excuse me, did you say "10:15 to Nutley"? Sal: Why, yes I dids. :stare into each others eyes and passionately kiss. Leela turns to Bender. Leela: whispering Bender! Did you just round up our dates at the bus station? Bender: Of course not. Sal: shouting Anybodys else for Nutley? :customers get up and head for the door. Zapp's date also leaves. Zapp: Baby, wait! You didn't show me your surprise. :has his arm around Amy. Gary: whispering You know what I'd like to do...? Fry: Oh, jeez, get a room! Gary: Maybe later. :is shocked. Fry: Hey, I have an idea: Let's all go out for ice cream. Gary: Actually, I thought Amy might like to come back to my place for coffee. Amy: I don't really like coffee. Gary: Neither do I. :is shocked again. Amy: Ooh, I feel a little tipsy! :is shocked again. Gary: Let me pick up the check. Fry: Nooo! drops his card onto the check. That's it I'm gettin' the hell outta here. tugs at his head. Ooh! Ow! :hears Fry and walks to their table just as Amy and Gary are about to leave. Leela: Why, if it isn't my favourite head on Amy's body: Fry. Fry: Oh, Leela! Amy: We were just on our way out. Leela: Nonsense, the evening's young. So, Gary, what do you do for a living? Gary: I'm a banking industry regulator. :sighs. Leela: Really? Y'know, I heard that banking industry regulations are really very simple. Gary: Oh, no, that's not true. You see, modern banking regulations are a product of five different regulatory traditions. Six if you wanna get technical. Leela: Oh, I do. Gary: It all began in 1410 when a number of noblemen convened... :and Leela look at each other. Fry: whispering Thank you. :smile. :['''Scene': Planet Express: Farnsworth's Lab. Zoidberg finishes stitching Fry's head to his neck.]'' Zoidberg: There you are, good as new. Except for your dorsal fin. I'm afraid I couldn't find it after the crash. Fry: Can I live without it? Zoidberg: If you call that living. Farnsworth: I still don't understand why you wouldn't let me graft a laser cannon onto your chest. To crush those who disobey you. sighs. But I guess we're just two different people. :and Zoidberg leave. Fry: So, uh, thanks for the ride, Amy. And I hope there are no hard feelings about your date, or stuff. Amy: It's OK, I had fun. And if I ever feel lonely I can just look over at this disfiguring scar and think of you. :smile. Amy leaves. Fry sighs. Fry: Well, anyway, it's nice to have my own body back. :yawns, stretches and pats his chest. He looks down and sighs. Enter Leela and Bender. Leela: So how's the old corpse? Everything hooked up OK? :stands up. Fry: Seems to be. My neck's just a little tender. touches his neck and kicks himself. Ow! Cool! does it again. Ow! Listen, Leela. Thanks for rescuing me last night. Leela: Anytime. I actually enjoyed hanging out with you. :Bender, counting his profits. Bender: Yep, everything worked out great thanks to good old Bender. Leela: Come on! It's not like you intentionally set us up with bad dates so we'd spend Valentine's Day together. Bender: Didn't I, Leela? Didn't I? :winks and a heart wipe closes the scene but opens up again. Leela: No! You didn't! You just corralled a bunch of stiffs at the bus station and pocketed our money! Bender: True. But in the end, isn't that what Valentine's Day is really all about? Leela: Yeah. Fry: I guess so. laughs and puts his arms around Fry and Leela and pats them. Watch the neck! Watch the neck! :kicks Bender's ass and it sparks. Bender: My ass! My beautiful ass! :explodes. :Credits. Category:Season Two Scripts Category:Episode Transcripts Category:Transcripts